[mnop371]

In a recent contest, The Washington Post asked readers to dream up newelements for the Periodic Table. Among the best of the batch:Limbaughium LbThe heaviest known element. It possesses an ever-expanding mass. Verywhite. Acidic. Emits heat but no light. Instantly polarizes all elementsthat come in contact with it. Repels protons andelectrons; attracts only morons.D&G BootsCoach BootsCheap UGG BootsInnofensium PcPrecisely equal numbers of electrons, protons, neutrons, leptons,quarks. Completely inert, utterly useless, but smells like a rose.